The Undermine Journal 101

        So now that The Undermine Journal is back up we can have fun again, or for the first-timers out there to start using it. Amazingly I never got to use it for my personal benefit before it went down (My Server's faction isn't fun).  But now that every US server is included there should little excuses to use this whenever needed.

Sometimes Undercutting Isn't Always A Good Idea

     Okay, first off this is no longer The Reality of Dan, but Making Gold With Dan. If you couldn't tell by the new title this is becoming a WoW gold blog. Now you may of noticed that I started posting about making gold a week or two age,but never changed my name. The reason for this was that I was waiting for Cold's Gold Factory to have their blogging carnival. So now that has been published,  I went ahead with the name change, Sorry in advance Cold for pulling changing but this name seems better.

     Now onto what this post is about. Sure, undercutting is the way we get our Auctions to be the cheapest auctions around, but sometimes it comes with a price.

The Beginning of Gold Blogging (TSM Buying)

Okay, so today I will start gold blogging. I changed the layout of the page to better accommodate this. Read some more detail on the video after the jump.

What 3 Pieces Of Advice Would You Give A Little Goblin? (3 Top Tips For New Auctioneers?)

     This post is for those who are interested in starting up a gold empire in WoW. This is also for Cold's Gold Blogging Carnival.
  
     1.You Will Need Addons: Yes, you might have your nice Frames addons and something for your action bars but if you want to be serious about starting your gold empire you should invest in at least Auctioneer (I have heard rumors of it working again), ZeroAuctions, or TradeSkill Master. Without these any operation will have to stay small. Being limited to the default AH UI makes me want to rip gank a gnome. Using the normal UI is fine and all, If you want to not have a large operation. If you need to keep your memory light i suggest you go and download Addon Control Panel, keep an addon set just for auctioneering and thats it. You know what everyone should download it, wouldn't have to relog for addons .

  2. Learn The 22 Steps: Now this may seem like an obvious, but then again I still see people put things on the Auction House that are under the Vendor Price. What exactly are these 22 steps? Well they are what I started off with and they can make you gold real fast. They were written by the great sage of gold blogging Markco of Just My Two Copper. It may seem pretty difficult on what to do at first but once you get the hang of it you will start flipping items for gold.

  3.Do Your Research: I don't know how many times I have not followed this advice and have payed for it. Read Patch Notes, read gold blogs (if you are reading this then you already probably are), listen to podcasts. If they buffed Tankard O' Terror to level 80 don't they think they would do the same for each expansion; however, this may not always be the case so make sure to read ahead. Another Prime example of this was the Frozen Orb changes.  For those of you who are just starting out in the World (of Warcraft) Frozen Orbs were the Wrath of The Lich King equivalent of Chaos Orbs. Thing was that anybody could roll on them and eventually they went unused due to gear getting better and better recipes that didn't incorporate them. Well, The mighty people at Blizzard decided to let people trade in their worthless Frozen Orbs to still useful trade mats. Once this change showed up in the patch notes nothing happened, the price of the orbs didn't go up. But when the patch finally hit prices skyrocketed . If someone were to of read the notes they would of been able to buy the orbs for cheap and flip them for a profit. This is why doing your research is important.

   This may seem like a lot but you too one day can become a mighty goblin and have your own gold empire.
  

How To Win At Mysterious Fortune Cards (AH'ing Pt. One)

   Yes, I know there are no addons running right now, but that is not the point. The point is how to sell these cards for gold. First, you need to make the cards and figure out the prices. Right now, it is estimated that one stack of low level herbs (Cinderbloom, Heartblossom, Stormvine) you get 5 Blackfallow Inks and .5 Inferno Inks. This means that for a card to even be profitable it will have to be more than a 1/5 of a stacks of herbs price. I typed it out in math for those who are lazy

P > H/5 (or 6 depending on which herbs you are using)
P= Price of card
H=Stack of herbs.

        Now there is also the reverse side of this, Darkmoon Cards. A couple pages later in my mailbox there are a few that sold. With Higher level herbs (Whiptail and Twilight Jasmine)  you can get 6 blackfallow inks and 1 inferno inks. I could type it out, but i'll just insert a picture of my "notes" during class.

Sorry about the quality sucking, I need a camera. So with this price ratio .44:1  this is still true to the most part. And since I don't know how to continue, this is it for todays post.

Portabella Mushrooms: Bane of Me

    This. This is the worst thing in existence.  They had these for a special at my work. Looking at them made me want to go WTF is that.  The worst part was to come. Letting these things cook in a skillet caused the upmost disgust smell ever, it overpowered all other smells in the room. They smell like.........
, who cares what they smell like they just are horrible

Ever Run Out of Time?

             As I am writing this I could be doing something else. Whether it be watching some TV( have some catching up to do on TiVo),  modeling things in Blender, playing guitar, or for the umpteenth time try to like Black Ops.  Sometimes I wonder if there is even enough time in the day to do all I want to do. Usually I just end up sitting in Orgrimmar making Darkmoon Cards, (Yes, WoW(Kel'Thuzad-Horde)).

        Eventually all I want to do will get done, but for now I need more than just 24 hours a day to do things. You ever have the same feeling?

ANTI-JOKE GALORE

Animals

• A duck walks into a bar...

Animal control is promptly called, the duck is then taken to a nearby park and released.

• A chicken begins crossing the street and is hit by several fast moving metal boxes with wheels.

• What do you get when you cross a chicken with a centipede?

A media circus about the debate over the morals and ethics of genetic engineering.

• What's worse than finding a worm in your apple?

The Holocaust.

• Why is a mouse when it spins?

Because the higher it goes, the fewer.

• Why is a duck?

Because one leg is both the same.

• What is the difference between one duck?

He have both legs the same size, especially left one.

• What do you call a cross between a chicken and a duck?

Chuck.

• What do a duck and a bicycle have in common?

They both have handlebars. Except the duck doesn't.

• What did Tarzan say when he saw the elephants coming over the hill?

Here come the elephants over the hill.

• What is the difference between elephants and grapes?

Elephants are grey, grapes are purple.

• What did Jane say when she saw the elephants coming over the hill?

Here come the grapes over the hill (Jane was colorblind).

• How do you kill a blue elephant?

You shoot it with a blue elephant gun.

• How do you kill a red elephant?

You hold its trunk until it turns blue and shoot it with a blue elephant gun.

• How do you kill a green elephant?

You embarass it until it turns red, hold its trunk until it turns blue and shoot it with a blue elephant gun.

• How do you kill a white elephant?

You paint it green, embarass it until it turns red, hold its trunk until it turns blue and shoot it with a blue elephant gun.

• How do you kill a pink elephant?

You scare it until it turn white, paint it green, embarass it until it turns red, hold its trunk untils it turns blue and shoot it with a blue elephant gun.

• How do you kill a yellow elephant?

There's no such thing, silly!

• If it takes half a chicken half a day to lay half an egg, how long does it take a cricket with a wooden leg to kick the seeds out of a dill pickle?

I'm not fooled for a second--there isn't enough information to solve the equation. You have to tell me which half of the chicken and I need to know what kind of wood the cricket's leg is made out of (oak, ash, maple, pine, etc.).

• Three blind mice walk into a bar. Being blind, they are mostly unaware of their surroundings, so it would be unethical to derive humour from their predicament.

• What's green, hangs on a wall and whistles?

I give up, what's green, hangs on a wall and whistles?

A herring.

What? A herring isn't green!

Who stops you from painting it?

A herring doesn't hang on a wall!

Who stops you from hanging it?

But who ever heard of a herring that whistles?

Well, two out of three isn't bad!

Vegetables

• What's green with legs?

Grass. (I lied about the legs!)

• What's green and pear-shaped?

A pear.

• Why did the banana explode?

Because it was a grenade.

People

• Why do firemen wear red suspenders?

To keep their pants up.

• What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza?

A Jew is a person adhering to the Jewish faith, and a pizza is an oven-baked, flat, usually circular bread covered with tomato sauce and cheese with optional garnishes.

• How do you know when a Frenchman has been near your house?

You don't, really, unless you were there to see him or if one of your neighbors saw him. I wouldn't worry about it, really.

• What do you call a middle eastern man in the cockpit of a plane?

A pilot, you racist.

• Hao Long is a Chinese man.

• Hu is the Chinese president.

• Why did John fall off his bike?

Someone threw a fridge at him.

• Why wouldn't Jack's car start?

Because it was a giant fish.

• Why did Sally fall off the swing?

Sally has no arms.

• Why did Jack stand in the middle?

He was happy twenty years later.

• Knock knock

Who's there?

• The Gestapo.

• How did the picture look?

It didn't, pictures don't have working eyes.

• What is better than an anti-joke?

A better anti-joke.

• Five girls run from what?

A cloud is new, says George.

• What happened to the girl next door?

Her house becomes again.

• Who is Mike Jones?

No one cares.

• Why did the plane crash?

Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

• What did John Lennon say when he was shot?

"Help me, I've been shot!"

• How do you make a mime yell?

Throw a brick at his face.

• How do you make a clown stop smiling?

Hit him with an axe.

• What do a bat and a button have in common?

Neither of them can sing like Swiss people...

Other

• Two drums and a cymbal fall off a cliff... ba dum chhhhh!

• So a blond, a brunette, and a redhead walk in to a bar. The bartender calls 9-1-1, and all three women stay the night in the hospital.

• What's brown and sticky?

A stick.

• What is the capital of Idaho?

Boise.

• A man walks into a bar...

Ouch! (alternately: "He faints.")

• What did Columbus say to his men before they got on the ships?

"Get on the ships!"

• What has eight legs, 8 brown eyes, and an invisible tail?

A spider.

A Scorpion with its tail dipped in butter.

• How many ducks does it take to make a duck?

Two Ducks. Why, because I saw it on National Geographic.

• What's red and shaped like a bucket?

A red bucket.

• What's blue and shaped like a bucket?

A red bucket in disguise.

• What's pink and furry?

Pink fur.

• What's blue and furry?

Pink fur holding its breath.

• An egg and a sausage are frying in a pan... The sausage says "Wow... It's hot in here!"

The egg says "Oh, my God! A talking sausage!"

• Is it farther to New York, or by bus?

Only if you take the train.

Halfway to the sunrise.

• What is the velocity of butter?

The velocity of butter is in a direct inverse proportion relating indistinctly to the mass of the moon.

Takes on Other Jokes

• Why was six afraid of seven?

It wasn't. Numbers are not sentient and thus incapable of feeling fear.

• Why was six afraid of seven?

Six was not afraid of seven, 10 was, so there!

• Why didn't the skeleton cross the road?

Because it was just the decomposing remains of a long forgotten murder case in a remote field.

• What is the difference between Neil Armstrong and Michael Jackson?

Neil Armstrong walked on the moon, and Michael Jackson likes little boys.

• My dog's got no dictionary.

How does he spell 'terrible?'

• What do you get when you cross a horse and a donkey?

A mule. Numbskull!

• What do you get when you cross France and Russia?

You don't get jack shit! But, Germany gets a two-front war!

• Guy walks into Doctor's office, tells the doc "I've got a real problem -- it hurts when I do this."

The doctor looks at him for a moment, then says "I'm sorry, you have cancer."

Awesome jokes are awesome

My First Post

So here is my first post. Time to start blogging